To most, sex is about reaching the station ‘Orgasm.’ But there’s a curious bunch that cares more about the journey. That bunch rides the ‘Tantric Sex Express.’
Okay, enough of those lazy train references. Tantric sex, because that’s the object of today’s debate, is an ancient form of sex that goes beyond physical pleasure, focusing more on connection, intimacy, and understanding.
Think of it as a meditative form of sex that invites you to slow down, be fully present, and connect with your partner on a whole new level.
Curious? Let’s dive into what tantric sex is, clear up some common myths, and explore how you can practice it in your relationship.
What Is Tantric Sex?
At its core, tantric sex is about more than the act itself.
It’s rooted in Tantra, an ancient Indian philosophy that blends the body, mind, and soul into one harmonious experience.
| Tantra (pronounced tanh-tra) derives from the Sanskrit word for weave. It refers to weaving together the physical and spiritual in the search for a deep and meaningful spiritual or energetic connection during a sensual experience – alone or with a partner. |
Rather than focusing on a single goal (in this case, an orgasm), tantric sex shifts your attention to the process. Every touch, breath, and moment of eye contact becomes an opportunity to connect – not just physically but emotionally and spiritually.
It’s less about what you’re doing and more about how present you are while doing it.
The Art of Tantric Sex
Tantric sex goes beyond conventional notions of intimacy. It’s not limited to physical penetration or the stimulation of erogenous zones. Instead, it explores a broad spectrum of erotic activities that focus on energy, connection, and mindfulness.
A different approach to intimacy
In a typical tantra session, the emphasis is on subtlety and presence.
Partners may engage in slow embraces, gentle caresses, and movements that heighten awareness of their bodies. The goal is to tune into the energy flowing between each other rather than rushing toward the climax.
Sometimes, tantric sex involves minimal physical movement. The focus shifts to the meditative and devotional aspects of connection, creating a deep, almost spiritual bond.
Pleasure without the limits
Tantric practices encourage slowing down, relaxing, and alternating between intense and calm moments.
This pacing can extend your sex sessions for hours, with enjoyment continuously building over time. For proud penis owners, this could involve practice like edging – the art of bringing yourself close to orgasm and then pulling back.
This not only increases stamina but also enhances the ability to experience pleasure without rushing into orgasm.
Staying mindful and present
Any sexual experience can become tantric when approached with mindfulness and presence. Whether it’s slow and sensual or raw and instinctual, tantric sex embraces the full spectrum of human intimacy.
Even dynamics like dominance and submission using BDSM toys can be infused with tantra when practiced with awareness.
It’s all about breathwork
Breathwork is a cornerstone of tantric sex. Partners use controlled breathing techniques to circulate sexual energy throughout their bodies.
This can unlock the potential for full-body pleasure, moving beyond physical sensations concentrated in your private parts.
By focusing on breath, movement, and awareness, tantric sex opens the door to a deeper and more connected experience of pleasure.
Why Try Tantric Sex
Okay, so you now know what tantric sex is and what its goal is. What you still might be wondering about is why you should try it.
Well, there are several benefits of practicing tantric sex. In fact, practicing it can very positively impact your body, mind, and soul.
Physical benefits
Tantric sex encourages you to slow down and focus on the sensations within your body. This heightened awareness can:
- Reduce stress: Deep breathing and mindful movement trigger your body’s relaxation response, lowering cortisol levels and promoting a sense of calm.
- Improve physical awareness: By tuning into each touch and sensation, you become more attuned to your body’s needs and responses.
- Enhance sexual satisfaction: The practice emphasizes pleasure over performance, helping you explore new sensations and expand your capacity for enjoyment.
- Boost stamina: Techniques like edging and controlled breathing increase endurance and help you stay present in the moment.
Emotional benefits
Tantric sex fosters a deeper emotional connection with your partner. It creates space for vulnerability, trust, and communication, which can lead to:
- Stronger intimacy: By focusing on your partner’s energy and presence, you build a sense of closeness that extends beyond physical acts.
- Better communication: The openness and mindfulness of tantric practices encourage honest conversations, making it easier to express desires, boundaries, and emotions.
- Healing past wounds: Emotional intimacy in tantric sex can help address and release feelings of shame or insecurity tied to past experiences.
Spiritual benefits
Tantric sex is deeply rooted in mindfulness, offering a pathway to spiritual growth and inner harmony. Through these practices, you can:
- Deepen self-awareness: The focus on presence helps you connect with your body and inner self, fostering a sense of self-acceptance and clarity.
- Feel more connected to your partner: By sharing energy and intention, you create a spiritual bond that enhances your relationship on all levels.
- Experience full-body pleasure: Breathwork and energy movement techniques expand pleasure beyond the genitals, awakening a sense of wholeness and unity.
How to Practice Tantric Sex
Now that the benefits of tantric sex are clear let’s talk about practice. If you’re thinking about spicing your sex life with a pinch of tantra, here are some tips and best practices to follow:
#1 Prepare your mindset & set the mood
Tantric sex begins long before physical touch. To fully embrace the experience, you must first create the right environment and mindset that will allow both you and your partner to feel safe, open, and fully present.
Start by talking to your partner about what you’re interested in exploring. Be clear about your boundaries and listen to theirs. This sets a foundation of trust.
Then, let go of the idea that sex has to “go somewhere” or lead to orgasm. Instead, focus on being in the moment and enjoying the experience as it unfolds.
With the mindset in the right place, it’s time to take care of the mood. Create a calming, distraction-free space. Dim the lights, light candles, or use essential oils for a relaxing aroma. Soft music or nature sounds can also help set the tone.
A good idea is also to dress comfortably. Wear something loose and soft that feels good against your skin. Going fully nude is also an option. The idea here is to feel physically at ease, which will help you relax in the moment.
#2 Start slow
Once the mindset and mood are set, it’s time to explore some core tantric practices. These aren’t rigid “rules” but rather tools to help you connect and deepen intimacy.
Begin by engaging in breathing sessions together. Sit facing your partner, either cross-legged or in a comfortable position. Try matching your breathing: inhale deeply and exhale slowly, aiming to sync your rhythms.
As you breathe together, imagine your energy connecting and flowing between you. This simple act can create a profound sense of unity.
Another simple way to engage in a tantric experience is eye gazing. Maintain eye contact with your partner for a few minutes without speaking.
This might feel vulnerable or even awkward at first, but it’s incredibly powerful in fostering emotional intimacy and helping you feel seen and connected.
As you gradually build connection and intimacy, start exploring each other’s bodies with gentle, deliberate movements.
Use your hands, fingertips, or soft objects like feathers or silk. Focus on the sensation of touch itself rather than rushing to stimulate erogenous zones. This practice can heighten sensitivity and build anticipation.
Also, keep in mind that tantric sex is about stretching time and deepening every moment. Extend foreplay, linger on kisses, or spend extra time touching and holding each other. Keep the pace slow and steady as you move toward intercourse.
#3 Experiment with foreplay
Tantric foreplay is a deeply intimate and intentional experience that focuses on connection, presence, and exploration. It transforms foreplay into a journey of discovery, where you savor every moment instead of rushing toward arousal.
The simplest tantric foreplay technique is full-body massage. Use warm oils and slow, deliberate touch to connect with and appreciate each other’s bodies.
Tantric touching takes this further, encouraging you to explore every inch of your partner with soft caresses and strokes, awakening senses and deepening your bond.
Mindful kissing becomes a meditation in itself – long, slow, and passionate, as you focus on the taste and feel of your partner’s lips and tongue.
Energetic touching invites you to play with the space between your bodies, hovering your hands just above their skin to heighten anticipation and attune to their energy.
| 🧘🏼♀️Try the Yab-Yum Position
For a more physically connected experience, try the yab-yum position, where one partner sits cross-legged with the other on their lap, facing them. This pose is perfect for combining breathwork, eye gazing, and rocking movements, blending physical closeness with spiritual harmony. |
#4 Practice makes perfect
Tantric sex isn’t about perfection; it’s about presence. And the more you practice, the more natural and intuitive it becomes.
That said, start small. Begin with one or two practices, like synchronized breathing or eye gazing, and build from there.
Be also sure to incorporate tantric elements into your regular intimacy, even if it’s just a few minutes of mindfulness or slower pacing.
And finally, stay patient. Don’t worry if it feels awkward or new at first. Over time, you’ll both grow more comfortable with the flow of the practice.
Embracing the Tantric Journey
Contrary to popular belief, tantric sex isn’t about achieving perfection or mastering advanced techniques. It’s about slowing down, being present, and rediscovering the connection and intimacy that feels authentic and meaningful.
Whether you’re looking to strengthen the bond with your partner or simply curious to try something new, tantric sex opens the door to a fresh, deeper perspective on intimacy and pleasure.
So, take a deep breath, let go of any expectations, see where the journey takes you, and embrace the experience.